Landscape of Loss: Haven the Podcast

SummaryJessi Michel shares her heartbreaking story of stillbirth and her advocacy work to prevent stillbirths. She recounts the day her daughter Freya was born still and the emotional journey that followed. Jessi emphasizes the need for better education and awareness about stillbirth, as well as improved data collection and research. She discusses two bills in Congress, the Maternal and Child Health and Stillbirth Prevention Act and the Shine for Autumn Act, which aim to address these issues. Jessi encourages listeners to support these bills by contacting their congressional leaders.TakeawaysStillbirth is a devastating experience that affects thousands of families each year.Improved education and awareness about stillbirth are crucial in preventing future cases.There are two bills in Congress, the Maternal and Child Health and Stillbirth Prevention Act and the Shine for Autumn Act, that aim to address stillbirth prevention through enhanced data collection, research, education, and awareness.Supporting these bills by contacting congressional leaders can make a difference in advancing stillbirth prevention efforts.More funding and resources are needed to train pathologists in stillbirth autopsies and to provide better support for families who have experienced stillbirth.Chapters00:00 Introduction and Personal Story21:33 Living with Loss and Finding Purpose32:46 Advocacy for Stillbirth Prevention43:00 The Urgent Need for Education and Awareness48:15 Improving Research and Data Collection51:26 Taking Action to Support Stillbirth PreventionLinks in this Episode:*Stillbirth Support link to message congressional leaders: bit.ly/StopStillbirth*To join Minnesota’s Stillbirth prevention advocacy groups: mnstillbirthlegislation@gmail.com or facebook group: Minnesota Stillbirth Prevention Advocacy*SHINE for Autumn Act on socials: Instagram; Facebook, website*Healthy Birthday, Inc on socials: Instagram; Facebook; website*Measure the Placenta on socials: Instagram; Facebook; website*Freya’s Hospital Library Wish list: tinyurl.com/FreyaLibrary

Childbirth is more than just that precious moment when a baby takes its first breath; it’s also about being fully prepared for everything that comes before. In today’s episode, we are thrilled to be joined by the Childbirth Advocate and Author of A Parent's Guide to a Safer Childbirth, Gina Mundy. In over 21 years as an attorney who specializes in childbirth cases, Gina has spent countless hours meticulously scrutinizing childbirth cases, conducting interviews with delivery teams, and thoroughly examining medical records to gain an in-depth understanding of every decision made during labor and delivery. These experiences paved the way for her writings, and her recently released guide is loaded with vital information that you probably won’t find in any other pregnancy book. Our conversation begins with Gina explaining her unique background in law and how it influenced her book. Then, we get a glimpse at the dangers of Pitocin misadministration before comparing the infant mortality rate and other statistics between America and other countries.  We also learn why fetal monitors are important, why and how Gina made her book less “scary” than other pregnancy books, how childbirth attorneys engage with stillborn cases, and the role of baby advocates. To end, our guest highlights the most important things for expecting mothers to be aware of, and she explains in detail why and how her book is going to positively impact the future of childbirth. Key Points from This Episode:Introducing the Attorney and Author, Gina Mundy.  Exploring Gina’s unique background in childbirth law and how it influenced her writing.    A closer look at her book, A Parent's Guide to a Safer Childbirth, and why she wrote it.  The Pitocin dilemma.  How statistics (like infant mortality rate) differ in America versus in other countries, and why. Advocating for fetal monitors.  Why Gina prioritized making her book less scary for expecting parents to read.  How she and other childbirth attorneys engage with stillborn cases.  The top 5 things that every pregnant mom must know, including how to find the right doctor.  Assessing the role of a baby advocate.  Why Gina believes that her book, when read, will positively impact the future of childbirths.   Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode: Gia Mundy  Gina Mundy on LinkedIn Gina Mundy on Instagram Gina Mundy on Facebook  Gina Mundy Email  A Parent's Guide to a Safer Childbirth A Parent’s Guide to a Safer Childbirth Chapter One TNMD Law Haven Tellwell

Being resilient in the face of unimaginable loss and choosing to heal and carry on is an unimaginably difficult task. Today’s guest has suffered incredible loss but she made the remarkable choice to take those hardships in her stride and create a platform to help other people through their grief. Tuning in, you’ll hear all about Barbara’s life, the loss of her infant son and 21-year-old son, and how she found purpose in creating support groups, as well as learn about her books, how she started to see her son’s life as a gift not just a loss, and so much more! We discuss some of the signs that your lost loved one is visiting you and Barbara tells us about the incredible signs she’s experienced before we delve into the importance of talking about your grief. Finally, Barbara tells us why she believes that healing is a choice and walks us through some of the first steps of resilience. As always, please listen with care and take note of the trigger warnings in the key points for this episode. Key Points from This Episode: Welcoming Dr. Barbara Hopkinson with a brief overview of her background.  TW: For listeners who wish to skip Barbara’s account of the horrific loss she has suffered, please skip the audio between [00:01:55] and [00:04:36]. TW: For listeners who wish to skip Barbara’s account of attempted suicide, please skip the audio between [00:08:18] and [00:09:01].  How starting The Compassionate Friends and A Butterfly’s Journey gave Barbara purpose.  When she knew that helping others would help her heal.  Why she views her son’s life as a gift, not just a loss.  Signs that your lost loved one is around you and why you need to remember them. Insight into A Butterfly’s Journey, Faces of Resilience, and Barbara’s grief methodology.  Why it is healing to talk about your loss and connect with others who have experienced loss.  What it looks like to choose to heal and take the first steps of resilience.  An overview of Barbara's experience with mediums.  Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode: Barbara Hopkinson on LinkedIn Barbara Hopkinson on Instagram A Butterfly’s Journey Free Song Download  A Butterfly’s Journey on Facebook A Butterfly’s Journey on Instagram A Butterfly’s Journey on YouTube A Butterfly’s Journey: Healing Grief After the Loss of a Child Faces of Resilience Faces of Resilience ABJs Faces of Resilience on Instagram Faces of Resilience on Facebook Giving Hearts Day The Compassionate Friends Haven Tellwell

For all of us – not just those who are dealing with loss – the holidays can be a troublesome period filled with overwhelming emotions and events. But navigating holiday landmines is as simple as always putting yourself first. Today, we welcome Hannah Stonehouse Hudson back to the show for the third time, as she shares some advice on how to get through the most emotionally-intimidating time of the year. We begin by learning how to properly plan for holiday gatherings, how to harness healthy holiday expectations, how to arm yourself with exit plans, and how the holidays (contrary to popular belief) are all about putting yourself first, especially if you are dealing with a new loss. We also discuss the importance of having check-in partners and an arsenal of canned responses before diving into the strategies for navigating holiday landmines and triggers. The remarkable Hannah Stonehouse Hudson shares tips on how to prioritize your own well-being in any given situation, and she explains why adequate self-care and finding joy in the holidays is easier to achieve than one may think. As ever, due to the sensitive topics discussed on this podcast, please listen with care. Key Points from This Episode:•    For the third time on this podcast – a very warm welcome to Hannah Stonehouse Hudson. •    How to plan for holiday gatherings. •    Why it is important to have healthy expectations for the holidays, and what that looks like. •    The best exit strategy for uncomfortable holiday gatherings: just leave. •    Why you need to give yourself permission to feel the way you feel in any moment.•    The value of a check-in partner, and why canned responses are your number one ally. •    Navigating holiday landmines and triggers. •    How to prioritize yourself when someone else needs the support that you’re not ready to give. •    Finding joy in the holidays once again; assessing what you need in/from any situation.  •    Self-care: How to maintain mental, emotional, and physical health during the holidays. Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode: Hannah Stonehouse HudsonHannah Stonehouse Hudson on LinkedInHannah Stonehouse Hudson on InstagramHannah Stonehouse Hudson on ThreadsHannah Stonehouse Hudson on XHannah Stonehouse Hudson on Facebook Time.Grace.SpaceStonehouse Photo ‘Bonus Episode: LIVE The Many Ways we Grieve Loss with Hannah Stonehouse Hudson’‘Episode 14: About the Grieving Process with Hannah Stonehouse Hudson’ ‘Self-Care: What It Really Is | Susannah Winters | TEDxHiltonHeadWomen’  Donna AshworthHavenTellwell

In the tough journey of grief, getting to a place where we can accept our loss or a traumatic experience isn't easy, it takes time and real effort. Today, we have Heather Gilbert with us, sharing her raw and emotional story of navigating loss and grappling with depression afterward. She is 18 years into her life journey with loss, and presently a mother of four children with one in heaven. Join us as Heather takes us through the heart-wrenching details of losing her unborn child, planning a funeral two days into her postpartum trimester, and finding her way through life after loss. She shares her experience journeying through her second pregnancy and the moment depression ultimately took hold. Tune in to be inspired by Heather's resilient story through loss, life after loss, and beyond. Thank you for listening.Key Points from This Episode:•    An introduction to our guest, Heather Gilbert.•    Heather takes us back to the very beginning of her story.•    She takes us through the experience of losing her baby very close to her due date.•    Planning a funeral two days postpartum. •    She details the journey of her second pregnancy and month after the loss of her first baby.•    When the depression finally hit. •    What changed her suicidal ideation and led her to see a therapist.•    She recounts her first experience with a psychiatrist.•    Heather shares about dealing with a divorce, four years after the loss. •    When the tears broke through. •    How she found her way to a home church. •    Her encouragement to anyone going through trauma: don’t do it alone.Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:HavenTellwell

Hope is one of the first casualties of loss, closely followed by a breakdown in faith. And while it’s necessary to experience grief to its furthest point, it’s just as important to recover your hope to begin living life to the fullest once again. We are thrilled to be joined by Rachel Lohman for today’s episode as she gives us behind-the-scenes access to her latest book, Miscarried Hope, a guide to help women who want to recover their faith after experiencing a loss. Rachel is also the Founder and Creative Director of Hope Again Collective, an online store that uses jewelry to tell the stories of moms who have suffered pregnancy and infant loss. Rachel details her miscarriage experience and explains what it means to be gifted with tragedy, before explaining where and how she found the moms whose stories can be found on her website, and why every one of the 250-plus stories is worthy of celebration. We also discuss how her work has been a catalyst for healing and growth, how loss breeds perspective, her intended purpose for Miscarried Hope, The five stages of hope, and how Silent Saturday replenished her hope reserves. If you’re struggling to give yourself grace and are looking for ways to restore your hope and faith after a loss, then Rachel has some important advice just for you! As always, please listen with care. Key Points from This Episode: •    Welcoming Rachel Lohman to the show as she briefly shares her background. •    Rachel’s miscarriage experience. •    What it means to be gifted with tragedy. •    How Rachel found the group of moms that influenced her jewelry line, Hope Again Collective.    •    The many faces of grief: the stories and testimonials that she shares on Hope Again. •    Celebrating the 250 stories that she’s shared so far, and their accompanying jewelry pieces. •    How her work has been an avenue for self-healing and growth. •    Loss and perspective and being guided by faith. •    Rachel explains the purpose of her book, Miscarried Hope. •    The five stages of recovering hope: expectation, despair, shock, grief, and active hope.  •    Silent Saturday: a pivotal moment in Rachel’s life when hope became bigger than fear.  •    Her advice to moms who are in the early stage of questioning God and their faith.  •    How to give yourself grace and why it’s important to do so. Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode: Rachel Lohman Rachel Lohman on LinkedInRachel Lohman on InstagramHope Again CollectiveMiscarried HopeThe BridgeHavenTellwell

Our internal dialogue is shaped as we journey through life, but by the time we reach adulthood, that inner voice often becomes negatively biased as a survival mechanism. Can we change this internal narrative to focus more on self-compassion? Leading a life guided by self-compassion can bring about remarkable transformations, but it requires practice. In today's episode, we delve into the concept of self-compassion with our special guest, Melissa Dahl. Melissa specializes in women's mental health, particularly maternal mental health. She is trained in various therapeutic techniques, including EMDR, DBT, Mindful Self-Compassion, PCIT, and the Attachment framework. Melissa offers Mindful Self-Compassion courses and works with post-partum moms and families. Join us as we explore what self-compassion truly means, the importance of validating our own experiences and emotions, and the skill of nurturing a kind inner dialogue. Melissa sheds light on the brain's default negative bias and the practice of mindful self-compassion. We also connect self-compassion to the processes of grief and loss while unraveling the emotional workings of the human brain. Get your journals ready and take notes as you listen to this incredibly insightful episode with Melissa Dahl. Thank you for tuning in!Key Points from This Episode:•    What is self-compassion: treating yourself like you would treat someone else.•    The importance of validating your own experiences. •    Developing the skill of being kind with our internal dialogue.•    How our brains default to a negativity bias for survival.•    Mel talks about the practice of mindful self-compassion.•    A good first step to flipping the switch of our internal dialogue. •    The beautiful path of relearning how to know ourselves.•    Growing into a great version of yourself (one you love).•    Why self-acceptance doesn’t mean we don’t hold boundaries with ourselves or others.•    How to tie self-compassion to grief and loss: self-compassion works by identifying a feeling.•    Mental gymnastics: the emotional brain and how it impacts the creation of self-blame.•    Name it and feel it: moving toward a release. •    A real-life example; breaking down the situation and implementing self-compassion.•    How we can work on and activate our attachment. Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Mel Dahl on LinkedInMel Dahl EmailHeal Well with Mel PodcastMindful Healing & ConsultingHavenTellwell

As parents of loss and parents of earth-side children, some of us often wonder and worry if we are doing right by the ones left behind. A question many of us often ponder is, how do we balance honoring our child that is no longer here, while we still care for our emotions, our partners, and our living children? Our guest today is here to share some insightful and encouraging expert advice. Annie Pelletier is a Sudbury-based psychotherapist who specializes in assisting families who have experienced pregnancy or infant loss. While doing this type of work, she came to realize that there weren't many resources to support children affected by this type of loss; something that can impact them greatly. She then authored a great book for children called Missing Our Baby: A Story of Life and Love for Children Who Have Lost a Sibling Due to Pregnancy or Infant Loss, a passion project for her to support grieving children. In this awe-inspiring conversation with Annie, we hear about her own journey navigating postpartum depression and the traumatic experience of miscarrying her second child. She shares her thoughts on how she’s changed since her experiences, why she’s an advocate for talking openly about grief, and why she encourages special consideration of language when we have conversations with our children about grief. We also talk about how to navigate your growing (and changing) child’s journey with grief and why PTSD isn’t talked about enough. This episode carries a trigger warning for grief and infant and child loss so please listen with care. Tune in now for all this and more on today’s episode of Haven the Podcast.Key Points from This Episode:•    A diagnosis of postpartum depression.•    Devastating news at the 12-week ultrasound of her second pregnancy.•    Being an advocate for what is in her control. •    The difference in dealing with her own trauma versus her clients (as a psychotherapist).•    How she navigates starting a grief-focused conversation with a child (aged 4-7).•    Her thoughts on helping kids work through the grief process while also protecting them.•    It’s okay for children to be sad; they have to embrace and understand their emotions. •    The importance of being present, as parents, in our conversations about loss with our kids. •    Thoughts on how to navigate the grief journey of our children (as they grow and change).•    Informing teachers, or schools, about your family’s loss and grief approach and process.•    Concerns surrounding the bottling up of emotions and grief in children and what to look for.•    We talk about the concept of secure attachment.•    Thoughts on why we aren’t talking enough about PTSD.Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:LilAngelTribe on EtsyLilAngelTribe on FacebookLilAngelTribe on InstagramMissing Our Baby: A Story of Life and Love for Children Who Have Lost a Sibling Due to Pregnancy or Infant Loss‘A mourning orca mom carried her dead baby for days through the ocean’HavenTellwell

There’s a saying that bad things often happen in threes. But what happens when the worst version of that is the loss of three loved ones in the span of 3 years? How would you possibly navigate a world you barely even recognize anymore? Our guest today is Angie Hanson and she shares with us her story about navigating three rounds of loss and grieving, how she survived it, and how focusing on her daughter Gracie helped her move forward. She talks about the difference between slow hospice deaths and sudden death and shares with listeners her ugliest point, the rage bubbling inside her. We also hear about where her path led her and how she started her incredible sympathy card business, Butterflies and Halos. To hear more about how she navigated through tough times and where you can find her cards, start listening now. Key Points from This Episode:•    We hear more about Angie Hanson and her story of the loss and grief of her son Garret.•    How placing her attention on her daughter, Gracie, helped with moving forward. •    What their early weeks and months of grieving Garret looked like as a family. •    Angie shares what the extended journey of grief looked like for her and her family.•    She shares about their fight with cancer and the death of her husband, Jack. •    How she dealt with the death of her brother two months after the death of Jack.•    She talks about the difference between the slow deaths of her husband and brother versus the sudden death of Garret.•    Angie talks about her ugliest point; being ragingly mad.•    Amidst all the losses, Angie shares the happiness they experienced with her new marriage.•    The talks they had to have with Gracie about loss and grieving.•    Angie shares with us where her path of grief has led her. •    The story behind Butterflies and Halos; grief and joy coexist.•    Some examples of what her cards say.•    Where to find her shop, blog, and social media pages. Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Angie Hanson EmailButterflies and HalosButterflies and Halos on InstagramButterflies and Halos on FacebookButterflies and Halos on EtsyHavenTellwell

Every woman’s experience of pregnancy is different. And while the news that you are expecting is often a cause for celebration, it can also be fraught with difficult challenges. These issues can be especially painful when you have a medical team that is dismissive of your concerns and doesn’t take your input seriously. That was the experience of today’s guest, Kendra Alexander, whose first pregnancy resulted in a painful miscarriage. Her experiences and the lack of support she felt from her medical team during that dark period led her to found Bravely She Blooms Wellness, and today she helps women who have experienced miscarriage and are hoping to try again. In our conversation Kendra opens up about her first pregnancy, the lack of support she felt from her medical team, and the healing work she needed to undertake after her loss. She also shares what it meant for her to find a doctor she could trust and explains how discovering that she had PCOS provided her with the answers she needed to move forward. To learn more about Kendra’s journey and her deep desire to help other women going through these experiences, be sure to tune in today.Key Points from This Episode:•    How Kendra learned she had a hormone imbalance and was at risk of infertility.•    The steps Kendra took to address her hormone imbalance and heal holistically from within.•    Kendra recounts the story of her pregnancy in June of 2020 and her painful miscarriage.•    TW: For those who wish to avoid Kendra’s account of her miscarriage, please skip audio between [12:24] and [18:19].•    Her deeply negative experiences within the medical system and how her concerns were repeatedly dismissed.•    The feeling of disconnect that Kendra experienced with her body after her miscarriage loss.•    Societal expectations of how women should behave and recover after miscarriage.•    The emotional healing work Kendra needed to go through after her loss.•    How Kendra found a new doctor she could trust.•    Kendra’s discovery that she had PCOS and why she was so relieved to have an answer.•    How PCOS greatly increases your chance of miscarriage.•    The affirming experiences that Kendra had with her doctor during her second pregnancy.•    Kendra’s desire to help other women and how she started Bravely She Blooms Wellness.•    Learn about Kendra’s journey to becoming a certified Integrative Nutritional Health Coach, Doula, and Christian Mental Health Coach.•    Suggested reading and resources on topics like PCOS, healing from loss, and preparing for pregnancy.Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Bravely She Blooms LinktreeBravely She Blooms on InstagramSupport after Miscarriage, Peace while TTC & Hormone Balance clarity Private Facebook GroupAwakening Fertility: The Essential Art of Preparing for Pregnancy by the Authors of the First Forty Days Stick It to Me, Baby!: Inserting Spirit Into the Science of Infertility The PCOS Diet Plan, Second Edit

Almost everyone who has experienced loss has wondered whether their loved one is happy and in a good place and they long to connect with them just one more time. In this (off-the-wall) episode of Landscape of Loss, we are welcoming a psychic medium to the show to tell us all more about his craft and how that can help parents suffering the loss of a child. Tuning in, you’ll hear about how Dean went from military service to psychic medium readings, who he works with, what his role is, how people feel about his craft, and the best time to connect with a loved one after their passing. Processing loss and allowing yourself to grieve is imperative for everyone earthside, and not, and today, our guest encourages people to give themselves time before seeking a connection with their lost loved one. We also discuss how his work has changed him for the better before delving into what he believes happens when we die. Dean explains why respecting people’s space is of the utmost importance and why he never dives into a reading without permission. You don’t want to miss out on this interesting conversation, so join us now!Key Points From This Episode: •    A brief overview of today’s interesting guest, the psychic medium, Dean McMurray. •    How sensing his deceased grandma helped him move from military service to mediumship. •    The kinds of people Dean works with and an estimate of who is a believer and who isn’t.•    Why Dean’s job is not to fill the hole of loss. •    The importance of researching your medium. •    Why you should process the loss of your loved one before seeking connection again. •    Dean tells us a beautiful story of a reading he did with a woman and her deceased father. •    How Dean’s experiences in his work have changed him and made him a better person. •    Dean shares his controversial opinion about a choice we make when we die.•    The questions he often gets about people’s loved ones. •    Dean explains why he is adamant about respecting people’s space until invited in. •    Our guest gives Jen a brief little reading based on what he senses.Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Dean McMurrayDean McMurray on LinkedInhavenmidwest.orgTellwell

Recovering from pregnancy loss takes time and patience. Here on Haven the Podcast, we tell tender stories of loss and share our experiences of surviving grief, hoping that they will assist grieving families in their recovery. Often, these stories offer perspective on years of grief gone by, but today, we hear from a mom who is in the thick of it. At just four months since the loss of her sweet girl, Magnolia, June Stilley joins us to speak candidly about what she believes everyone should know about life in the “immediate after.” While learning to navigate her own grief, June also has to come to terms with her family’s grief and figure out what it means to parent a child who is no longer here. In this episode, she shares an emotional and potentially-triggering account of her labor induction before emphasizing the importance of educating ourselves about grief and making an effort with those who have experienced loss, even when we don’t know what to say. She also highlights the value of connecting with the lost parent community, honoring your angel baby in whatever way feels right, and using painful experiences as an opportunity to bring something positive into the world. For more gentle recommendations about coping with grief after pregnancy loss, be sure to tune in today.Key Points from This Episode:•    June introduces herself and shares about her pregnancy with Magnolia.•    The earth-shattering moment when June realized that Magnolia was already gone.•    Coming to terms with telling her family and experiencing their grief too.•    How the blanket she held her angel baby in has become a security blanket for June.•    TW: For listeners who wish to avoid June’s raw and intimate account of her labor induction process, please skip audio between [0:12:23] and [0:17:10].•    Piecing together what it means to parent a child that is no longer with you.•    Why June has been so intentional about sharing her grief and telling Magnolia’s story.•    The importance of educating ourselves and becoming more comfortable with grief.•    What June means when she says she is experiencing a “grief fog.”•    How losing her pregnancy has made June more fearful of losing her living children.•    Reminding yourself of what is real and what is true for today, one day at a time.•    June shares her gratitude for her support network and the lost mom community.•    How June is honoring Magnolia through Magnolia’s Message.Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Magnolia's MessageJune Stilley PhotographyHavenTellwell

Grieving the loss of a child is every parent’s worst nightmare and the pain of what-ifs can be crippling. Our guest today courageously joins us to share her potentially triggering and emotional journey of unexpected infant loss, when her beautiful baby girl, Reese, was stillborn mere hours before her scheduled delivery. Amanda Duffy opens up about the red flags throughout her pregnancy and the missed opportunities to intervene. Her devastating experience propelled her to do everything in her power to help others experiencing the same radical heartbreak and provide tangible avenues to create awareness in the hopes of preventing unnecessary stillbirths. In this episode, we hear how she is supporting families through Tethered Care Consulting, and how simple education truly can mitigate the risk of pregnancy loss. Please note that this episode carries a trigger warning for stillbirth. Tune in for a moving conversation about mothers’ intuition and the process of learning to grieve and love at the same time. Key Points From This Episode:•    Introducing our guest, Amanda Duffy.  •    Amanda opens up about her pregnancy with her second-born child, Reese, who was stillborn mere hours before her scheduled delivery.•    The red flags throughout Amanda’s pregnancy and missed opportunities to intervene.•    The dismissal of mothers’ intuition in the medical system.•    TW: For those who wish to avoid Amanda’s account of her delivery day, please skip audio between [19:56] and [30:43].•    The information that had been withheld from her throughout her pregnancy, and what she learned about stillbirth after her daughter’s birth.•    How she channeled her grief into helping others experiencing infant loss.•    The effectiveness of Count the Kicks in reducing the number of stillbirths.Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Amanda Duffy on LinkedInAmanda Duffy on InstagramTethered Care ConsultingTethered Care Consulting on InstagramCount the KicksHavenTellwell

Grief takes many forms, and being surrounded by a community can help you learn how to re-enter the world and begin the lifelong mourning process. Joining us today on Haven the Podcast is Michael Liben, husband, father of three, and podcast host, to discuss the loss of his 15-year-old daughter, Liel. In this episode, you will hear about Michael and his wife’s difficulty having children, their two surviving children, and the health issues Liel experienced before her death. Michael had a slightly different attitude to his daughter’s inevitable death, and today, he explains how he reacted to the news that she would not make it, how his family reacted to his attitude, the decision they made to donate her organs, and what they felt when she passed. We hear all about mourning in Judaism, shiva, and how food, community, and laughter saved him in his grief. Finally, Michael tells us why he is a strong believer that grief shared is grief lightened and about the podcast he has been hosting for seven years in his daughter’s memory. This beautiful episode about being realistic in your faith, mourning with loved ones, and continuing life after losing a child is not one to be missed, so tune in now. Key Points From This Episode: •   A warm welcome to today’s guest, Michael Liben. •    He tells us about his children, the health issues his daughter experienced, and her death. •    Michael explains why prayer is a conversation and how he approached his daughter's death.•    How his children reacted to Michael’s attitude to their sister’s death.•    The dangers of a pacemaker coming in contact with a cell phone. •    Why autism was more difficult for Michael to handle than a heart defect. •    Why he was happy to donate his daughter’s organs and the release he felt when she died.•    Jen tells us about her experience of talking to a priest after losing her son. •    Michael explains grief in Judaism and how laughter saved him during shiva.•    How sharing a meal connects you in mourning. •    The perspective created by realizing people outside of the immediate family lost someone too. •    Why grief shared is grief lightened. •    Michael tells us about the podcast that he hosts in his daughter’s memory. Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Michael Liben on LinkedInMichael Liben on TwitterBereaved But Still MeBereaved But Still Me on AmazonHavenTellwell

Pregnancy after loss feels like a journey too difficult to navigate but thanks to today’s guest, Lindsey Henke, it is possible and your desire for another child can outweigh your fear of loss. In this episode of Landscape of Loss, we take a look at our guest’s stillbirth experience and her second pregnancy as she explains what helped her, what didn’t help her, and what she wished she had done differently. Lindsey also tells us what made her decide to have another baby, how you can navigate making that decision, and the importance of having boundaries after a loss. She even explains emotional cushioning, why it’s normal, how you can connect with your baby despite your fears during pregnancy, and what affirmations can help you quell the anxiety of pregnancy after loss. Finally, Lindsey tells us all about her incredible support system for women who have suffered loss and want to have another child, Pregnancy loss Support and how it has helped her in her own healing. This episode is heartfelt, educational, and inspirational and is not one to be missed so tune in now!Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Lindsey HenkeLindsey Henke on InstagramLindsey Henke on FacebookPregnancy After Loss Supporthavenmidwest.orgTellwell

What if, instead of expecting ourselves and those around us to move on from the loss of a loved one, we made space for loss to become part of the new life being created? This is a very exciting episode as it is our very first live episode recorded at our annual gala! We are joined by the incredible grief educator and motivational speaker, Hannah Stonehouse Hudson, to discuss how she navigated the loss of an infant and her husband in the light of publicity that followed a viral photograph she took. Listening in to this potentially triggering emotional discussion, you’ll hear all about the shocking premonition Hannah’s husband had about his death (and how it prepared her), the beautiful photo Hannah took that went viral, why her husband’s death was public and how she handled it, and how she was inspired to use the internet to help others with their grief. Grief is like a fingerprint, unique to each and every individual, and today Hannah encourages us to refrain from judging ourselves in our grieving process and rather give ourselves ‘time, grace, and space.’ We also discuss how Hannah has gotten through difficulties before looking into how to support people through loss, why nobody actually knows what to do or say, and how allowing people to feel and experience things in their own way is impactful. Finally, she shares some research she has done on grief and leaves us with the powerful comfort that our loved ones are always with us. Please note that this podcast carries a trigger warning for death and grief so please listen with care. To hear this beautiful conversation, press play now!Key Points from This Episode:•    Welcome to our very first live episode of Haven the Podcast!•    Introducing today’s guest, Hannah Stonehouse Hudson. •    The importance of talking about hard things and how her husband prepared her for his death. •    All about Hannah’s viral photograph. •    How she used her husband’s public death to help people handle tragedy through the internet.•    Why there is no wrong way to grieve and why you cannot judge yourself and how you grieve. •    How to get in the habit of practicing healthy self-talk: time, grace, and space.•    How Hannah has made it through such difficult times and is still willing to talk about it. •    The powerful impact we can make if we take time to allow people to experience hard things.•    Why nobody knows what to say to somebody grieving a loss. •    Why people who have lost someone want to talk about them and tell the stories. •    Why the seven stages of grief have been denounced. •    The research she has done on death and grief and some interesting findings she’s made. Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Hannah Stonehouse HudsonHannah Stonehouse Hudson on LinkedInHannah Stonehouse Hudson on TwitterHannah Stonehouse Hudson on InstagramHannah Stonehouse Hudson on FacebookHannah’s Viral Photograph and Huffington Post Article

This episode carries a trigger warning for infant loss and miscarriage with very graphic accounts of each. Please listen with care. Burying a baby you have carried for nine months is unfathomable and to lose another seems like a cruel twist of fate. Today’s guest has experienced a world of unimaginable grief as she has lost three children in the past decade. Sarah Smith Warren and her husband were settling down to start a family when they lost their first child at 12 weeks and you can imagine their apprehensive joy when they fell pregnant again and carried that child to term. In this episode, Sarah shares the most incredibly inspirational journey of the loss of her stillborn child Boyd, the birth of her one surviving son Milo, and her second miscarriage. She paints the picture of her experiences through the lens of her journal entries and shares potentially the triggering and emotional realities of grief and loss. We discuss the difficulties associated with watching your partner grieve when you feel helpless to assist them, how people can educate themselves, learn, and ask questions to comfort people who have experienced loss, how grief brain affects you, and the incredible way children process death. Sarah also tells us about her amazing business, Soul Space Work, and why she is dedicated to encouraging people to accept their colleagues; warts and all. This is an emotional and uplifting episode that will inspire anyone who has experienced loss to come alive again and will educate people on how to interact with someone who is grieving. You do not want to miss this one!Key Points From This Episode:•    A brief overview of today’s guest, Sarah Smith Warren.•    How Sarah’s dreams have changed over the last decade. •    TW: For listeners who wish to avoid the story of Sarah’s stillborn, please skip audio between [00:08:03] and [00:13:35].•    Sarah tells us about the incredible nurse who held space for her after her son was stillborn. •    The isolation Sarah and her husband Jake experienced when they went home with no baby. •    The difficulties of watching your partner go through the hardest time of their life. •    Why seeing people again for the first time after the loss of her baby was so difficult for Sarah. •    Why we must learn how to help people who’ve experienced loss by asking what they need.•    What inspired Sarah to start Soul Space Work. •    The fog you experience during grief: grief brain. •    What pregnancy was like for her after the stillbirth and the fear of losing her son after birth. •    TW: For listeners who wish to avoid Sarah’s account of her second miscarriage, please skip audio between [00:45:35] and [00:46:22].•    How children are able to process and understand grief in such a special way. •    Why Sarah loves it when people keep Boyd and Luna’s existence alive.•    Sarah tells us about her business, Soul Space Work. •    The importance of accepting all the parts of colleagues; even the ‘broken bits’.Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Sarah Smith Warren on LinkedInSoul Space WorkSoul Space Work on FacebookSoul Space Work on InstagramSoul Space Work Email Addresshavenmidwest.orgTellwell

We know that grief and joy can coexist after loss, but sometimes, we are forced into that space far quicker than anyone would have expected. Today’s guest, Megan Hillukka, was 36 weeks pregnant with her fourth child when her third passed away at just 15 months old. She is joining us to share her story of loss and finding peace after processing grief. During this episode, you will hear how Megan navigated never finding the answers to why her child passed away, how her first-hand experience of grief taught her that the process is not linear, and how she works through the felt experience of grief in the body. Hear about her work with moms, helping them to peel back the layers of loss and approach feelings of guilt with the knowledge that each step can be revisited whenever needed. We touch on comparison and how each path is unique, as well as talking through Megan’s work coaching other parents through their difficult experiences. Megan offers a membership where parents get access to powerful support and tools to help them walk through their journey of grief. Hear all about what her compassionate offering, and plenty of pearls of wisdom from her story today. Key Points From This Episode:•            Finding words to shape her experience as ‘trauma’.•            The challenge of never having an answer for why she had lost her child.•            Why Megan feels content with not knowing why Aria passed away after processing her grief.•            The nature of grief which is not linear.•            How she has chosen to process guilt in her body. •            Megan’s relationship with guilt and grief and how she has learned to move beyond grief.•            The work she does with moms to help them to unpack and process the layers of loss.•            Dealing with guilt as parents who’ve experienced loss.•            Learning that you can revisit steps of the grief process if you need to. •            Allowing the complex mixture of emotions surrounding grief to coexist.•            The challenge of grieving Aria while nursing a newborn.•            Why every path after loss is challenging, regardless of the circumstances.•            How comparison creates disconnection.•            Megan’s work coaching other parents through their difficult experiences.•            Her services which include tapping meditations specific to child loss, emotion meditations to connect to the physical experience, and more.•            Managing unnecessary thoughts that create additional suffering.•            Distinguishing between clean grief and dirty grief.•            What is included in Megan’s online membership; tapping meditations, breathwork, live calls and more.•            Where to find Megan Hillukka online. Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Megan HillukkaMegan Hillukka on InstagramMegan Hillukka on PinterestGrieving Moms Podcasthavenmidwest.org" rel="nofollow">

First-time mothers are rarely prepared for the full spectrum of biological changes that happen during pregnancy, and as a society, we have created an endless list of assumptions around what motherhood and pregnancy should look like. But there are countless pregnancies that don’t adhere to these textbook expectations. And too often when women struggle with issues like postnatal depression, they are left feeling isolated, alone, and abnormal. Such was the case for today’s guest, Lo Nigrosh when she found herself unable to lactate and feed her first child. Her experiences led her on a journey to become a certified lactation counselor, childbirth educator, and host of the podcast The Milk Making Minutes. In our conversation, Lo explains the systemic barriers she encountered during her struggles, the inexplicably long process of becoming a lactation counselor, and what she has learned from helping women on their lactation journeys. We also cover the intricacies of how lactation is triggered during different phases of pregnancy, how to address lactation after the traumatic loss of your baby, and why donating breast milk can be a healing journey for some. This episode carries a trigger warning for miscarriage, pregnancy, and infant and child loss, so please listen with care.Key Points from This Episode:•   Get to know today’s special guest, Lo Nigrosh.  •   Lo’s difficult experience struggling to breastfeed her first child.•   The systemic barriers that Lo encountered during her struggles.•   Why she decided to become a lactation counselor.•   An overview of the long process of becoming a lactation counselor.•   What Lo has learned from her time as a peer counselor and lactation counselor.•   Understanding mammary glands and how breast milk is created.•   A breakdown of the three stages of lactogenesis.•   The lactation that occurs when you lose your baby and why it is called ‘white tears’.•   How to address the lactation you experience after the loss of your baby.•   Examples of infections and complications that can occur when the lactation you experience after the loss of your baby is not treated correctly.•   Some of the options you have to donate your breast milk after a loss.•   Why breast milk donation could be part of your healing journey.•   How mothers who have experienced a miscarriage or lost their baby aren’t adequately prepared by doctors for how their bodies will react.•   Learn about Lo’s podcast The Milk Making Minutes.•   How Lo’s podcast explores breastfeeding struggles and triumphs through the lens of systemic barriers.Lo Nigrosh on LinkedInQuabbin Birth ServicesThe Milk Making Minutes Community GroupThe Milk Making Minutes PodcastHuman Milk Banking Association of North AmericaHuman Milk 4 Human Babies Global NetworkEats on FeetsHavenTellwell

After a loss, it can feel impossible to find the right support. No matter where we live, it seems that there are obstacles to basic concepts of empathy and understanding, especially in healthcare settings. Today, we travel across the world to chat with pregnancy loss life coach, Sharna Southan, about her own loss and what she is doing in Australia to help other moms who have experienced pregnancy loss. Sharna is an ICF-certified coach, mother to her rainbow baby, and founder of the Institute of Healing through Pregnancy Loss. Following her heart into business after her own pregnancy loss in 2017, Sharna firmly believes that our adversity gives us an opportunity to grow. Tuning in, you’ll learn more about Sharna’s specialized loss support services and how she guides bereaved parents through healing, recovery, and living their fullest expression after pregnancy loss, plus so much more. We hope that this episode will give you the support you need you to reclaim your power after loss and re-write your story so that you can confidently look toward a brighter future. As always, please be aware that this podcast discusses miscarriage, pregnancy, infant, and child loss. We encourage you to listen with care.Key Points From This Episode:•    Sharna speaks candidly about her traumatic and isolating experience of pregnancy loss.•    The importance of empathy in traditionally sterile healthcare settings.•    Why better education about fertility and pregnancy is necessary.•    The hope for the future that is stripped away after pregnancy loss.•    Processing grief and loss before “trying again.”•    How Sharna followed her heart and soul into business.•    The importance of having a “safe place to be weak” while you heal.•    Understanding how emotions are stored in your body.•    Healing as an ever-evolving journey (life doesn’t come with a trigger warning!)•    How Sharna guides her clients to process their emotions, beliefs, and thought patterns.•    What it means to reconnect with your future.•    Insight into the education program that Sharna has created for service providers.•    The ripple effect that loss has throughout our lives.•    Ways that adversity provides us with opportunities to grow.Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:Sharna SouthanSharna Southan on LinkedInSharna Southan on TwitterSharna Southan on InstagramHavenTellwell