Relationships & emotions: Together we will conquer, Ep 39

From Sobriety To Recovery: An Addiction Recovery Podcast

19-11-2019 • 42 mins

In this weeks episode we cover the Relationship sphere and the Relationship component in hopes we can uncover new and better ways to deal with our emotions and how to relate to others that have no idea what the hell we're feeling - and we may not know what we're feeling either, lolol.

One of my main issues is that I have been feeling things, my self, my relationships - everything in between, through this stunted and hazed set of goggles for so long I am not sure how to put my feelings into words, let alone feel them.

Addiction recovery is tough. Now bring others into the mix, which, you know, is gonna happen in life, and it becomes that much more layered and confusing. Here are my not so genius ways to start the process of connecting without substances.

- Verbalize your feelings to the person in front of you.

- When playing mental gymnastics, meaning you are running countless scenarios in your head, verbalize the thought process you are going through to the person/people involved.

- Be willing to hear someone else's opinion, thoughts, and/or feelings on a subject and don't get emotionally triggered when they don't agree with you.

- When emotionally triggered, breathe deep, and think to yourself how you would feel if you expressed yourself to someone and they just shut you down without hearing you out.

- Realize it's gonna take a lot of time, effort and work to get your emotional mind right - don't worry, you have time, and best of all - you are sober.

Tips to dating an addict:

  • We do not process emotions the way others do.
  • We do not prioritize people, places, events, etc. the way others do.
  • We do not know how to verbalize my emotions.
  • We are not broken, just bruised.
  • We can figure this out - it's just gonna take a lot of time.
  • Our beliefs and values about dating and relationships will be based on my memories and those memories are f*cked up.
  • Come to think of it - this list might be most people, not just those of us in addiction recovery.
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